I'll admit it. I had preconceived notions about job hunting. I always thought that as long as you were willing to work, there would be a job out there for you. It may not pay the best or it may require you to stuff yourself into a canon to be propelled from nightly, but at least you would have a job.

But this is 2009. I think they call this the Post-Post-Modern Era-Repossessed.

I've actively searched for a job for two months in both my field and not in my field. Have I searched as hard as I could, going to job fairs and public assistant sources and temp agencies? Not exactly, but I've put in enough applications and resumes to kill a small forest, made enough calls that my cell bill has increased and still, I can't get an interview let alone a call back.

I realize that most of this is my own doing. If I would have just sucked it up, had pre-employment arrangements before I graduated, been more pressed to take and pass my licensing exam, I would not be in my sinking ship. I understand now that without my license my education pretty much does squat for me. I have an education so no fast food chain is going to hire me, not when teenagers would require much less pay. No other respecting job would hire me because I've chosen not to work for the past... 4 years (Damn! It's been that long?!) to raise my children. Not to mention because I still fully intend to take the damn exam and pass (provided the skies open up and manna from heaven falls and I can sell it for $24.99 a pop).

Let's review: I did take the exam once, but not before I hurt my back and took the 5 hour exam at a computer in a desk chair in severe pain.

So, the strangest thing happened. I get a call from an online university because I had ticked a box that said I was interested in going further in my education on some website I can't even remember now, looking for jobs. I indulged the lady who was quite polite and asked me about my degree and work history to match me up with a program. A not so long story later, I'm thinking about applying to graduate programs, any that I could possibly get into with out much of a work history.

I'm just not sure what to do. It seems the cosmic forces have it out for me and my chosen career path. I'm trying not to take each rejection personally, because I can think to myself that there are probably people who are just flat out better qualified. But damn it, I thought we were heading in the right direction, maybe we still are... it's just taking us longer to get there.